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Better Dates
Edward Suhadi comment 8 Comments
Kelvin and Paulina showing us how it's done

It started as a stream of tweets to channel my frustation when I was unable to get a parking spot for almost thirty minutes in a mall’s parking space. I tweet this, this, this, and this.

In essence, I hate going to the mall on Sundays. If it was not of the utmost importance, I usually stay away from them.

That last Sunday, grumpy as ever in my car, I saw a lot of young couples getting out of their cars while I was circling around. You can tell they are dating. The guys look cool, and the girls dress up.

Then a light bulb came on.

I interviewed many couples before a photoshoot to get to know them, to know what their relationship is like, so maybe I can get some ideas for the concept. But everytime I ask, “what do you guys do for dates?”, the answer is almost always unanimous: “Well, a trip to the mall. Then a movie. Then dinner. Usual stuff.” (Considering the movie ban right now, you’re really screwed.)

Hey, don’t get me wrong, I am as guilty as the next guy when it comes to dates (that was like 5-10 years ago for me), but I think right now, we can do better than that.

We can be more romantic like they did in the movies, or like they tell it in the books. We’re not trying to be cassanovas here, just regular guys and gals getting to know each other in a better kind of way.

I know, especially for us Indonesian couples, we get the short end of the stick: no parks, no barbeque pits, no decent sidewalks, no ice cream trucks, no baloon men, no riversides with ducks quacking, I get it, I cried with you too. But it is not love if it does not find a way, is it?

We could do more meaningful stuff, telling stories about our families while we were chopping onions, sharing our life values while we jog on the morning sun, or just stared at each other eyes quietly while we wait for the cupcakes to rise.

A married couple of friends told me that when they were dating, they visited museums, galleries, and monuments. They are the only couple that I know that did that, and it changed drastically on how I view them, until now.

Not to mention the fun factor, the romantic factor, the ‘uh-I-love-these-qualities-in-a-man’ factor. Dudes, if you did this right, I am sure the impressions are far more lasting than watching Transformer 3 over popcorn.

So here’s my proposal to you love birds:

Go on better dates.

I know we can. We can break the thoughtless cycle of asking our girl to choose between two letter romances every weekend (PS or PI dear? or GI? PP? Sure.)

Take chances, break the cycle, give some effort into it. Experience new um… experiences together.

Like every change of habits and behaviour, what everyone need are inspirations, and assurance that it will work. So here I am launching this blog, betterdates.posterous.com

Just post any ideas on your head about how a decent, sweet, well-meaning, dates ought to be, and hopefully, somewhere, somehow, a couple will spend a day that’s hard to forget thanks to the inspirations they found on that blog. And if that couple turn out to be you, do please share it with all of us, also on the blog. I’ve thrown a couple posts to get this started.

My goal? Countless couples all over Indonesia checking the blog up, getting ideas and inspirations, and actually plan dates that are gonna do the relationship some good.

Please don’t reject this. Don’t kill it prematurely by saying, “Arghh, it’s just too corny, too sweety-switzy. It’s crappy.” You don’t know how many girls are dying for you to take her to the balcony blindfolded.

Dates don’t have to be sugary, corny or cheesy. They just need to be different, meaningful and worth remembering.

And like any movement, the blog will die without people actually responding to the idea. So please, keep it alive, post often, pass this around, and most importantly, believe in the idea.

Maybe, just maybe, my interviews will get a lot more interesting.

* * * * * * * * * *

How to post an idea or a story of a successful date? Just email betterdates@posterous.com from any email account, from any computer, any mobile phones, be it a Blackberry or an iPhone, or heaven-forbid, a Nokia, at any time. You can put your name at the end of the email, or just leave it anonymous. Any indecent, disrespectful email will not pass my moderation.

  1. Hey let’s start the dating revolution. Guys & Girls need to be more creative, spontaneous, have fun, make it memorable. I’m 100% with you on this. It’s getting so lame n boring these days, btw I get the same answers too from most couples. It doesn’t have to be that way. I’ll post some ideas on your blog.
    Btw, one memorable date we did 10 years ago was tea plantation (puncak) hiking in the rain, drenched all the way. That’s how I won my dream girl. Well of course along with a few more adventures *she likes it.

    1. You too big guy, could you post your puncak experience to the blog also? 

      A revolution, that’s what I am hoping for. But we need to push hard forward, you know how hard it is for a society to change. Let bring the idea alive!

  2. Remember that tweet where I mentioned that my boyfriend took me to an Arabian horse ranch when we first started dating? The horses were elegant & gorgeous and their stalls were also bordered by a fruit orchard, so it was a nice place all around. 

    But horses are horses, y’know… so the grounds around the stalls, although relatively clean, still had traces of horse p**p, p*ss and other ‘barn’ gunks. So before we headed back to the car, I wanted to wash my hands and feet first at an outdoor faucet. What he did next melt my heart and set him apart from most guys: he told me to take off my sandals and he gently washed my feet clean. (…oh, be still my heart!)That’s one of the many reasons why I am now his wife. 🙂

  3. Remember that tweet where I mentioned that my boyfriend took me to an Arabian horse ranch when we first started dating? The horses were elegant & gorgeous and their stalls were also bordered by a fruit orchard, so it was a nice place all around. 

    But horses are horses, y’know… so the grounds around the stalls, although relatively clean, still had traces of horse p**p, p*ss and other ‘barn’ gunks. So before we headed back to the car, I wanted to wash my hands and feet first at an outdoor faucet. What he did next melt my heart and set him apart from most guys: he told me to take off my sandals and he gently washed my feet clean. (…oh, be still my heart!)That’s one of the many reasons why I am now his wife. 🙂

  4. Hey,nice post.Interesting article.I am totally impressed by your views.Its really an informative & interesting article.I enjoy at the time of reading this article.Keep sharing with us.

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