Every couple in the world want their wedding day to be perfect. To be full of joy, laughter, hugs and tears. To be the day that they will always remember in all of their lives. To be the most beautiful.
I have the one and only secret for this kind of wedding day 😉
I have been and shot (hopefully) everywhere and everything. From the 8 to the 6000 guests wedding. The simple blessing ceremony to the lavish Preston Bailey’s party. Weddings in Jakarta and Bali, to Switzerland, Finland, and Italy. Chinese, Javanese, Batak. And from these countless days I have found the ultimate truth in having the greatest wedding day.
A beautiful wedding takes a lifetime.
A lot of people think by throwing money into the budget, pushing everything to the limit, pulling favors here and there, and making sure that every single detail is met, they will get their perfect wedding.
Sure at the surface level, a wedding is about all that and then some, but we need to remember that a wedding is about a whole lot deeper things. Especially. Especially. Especially couples, need to remember.
I found the most beautiful and the most sweet and the most memorable and the most heart-warming weddings are the ones when the couple and the families that were joined in that union are people that are too, ‘beautiful’.
People and families that have helped others, respect others, care for others. Familes that have been an answer and blessings to a lot of people, families that has been an inspiration and role models for people that they meet and touch. Couples that for their whole lives, has been nothing but being supporting friends to their community and loyal companions for everyone that are fortunate enough to call them friends.
Authentic, real weddings are not about the photography and the dress, nor about the flowers and make up, or the venue and the decoration, but about the promise in front of the altar, about the familes that are there to give their blessing to this union, about the friends that want to be there because they want to be a part of this important moment for somebody that is important to them. It is not about guests that want to come not only to fulfill an invitation and eat free food, but about people that come to look you in the eye and congratulate you and send their wishes for your happiness.
I have seen weddings where people did not stop crying, they cannot stop hugging, they cannot stop whispering prayers of well-being for this couple making their union on that day. The guests shook their hands firmly, smiling ear to ear congratulating and wishing for the happiness for the whole family. The day filled with laughter, besties screaming, brothers jumping, sisters dancing and parents smiling. It was so beautiful, and I always feel lucky if I ever get a chance to shoot those kind of days.
Now guys, that is a wedding.
And those kind of weddings you don’t get in a year’s preparation, or in how much attention to details we give or how much money we throw in.
Those kind of weddings are the by-product of a beautiful life. You cannot design them deliberately. There is no shortcuts.
Those kind of weddings take a lifetime.
What kind of person you are, what kind of seeds you have been sowing, what kind of influence you have been to the people you touch, what kind of person you have been to the world. These things are the long-prepared, slow roasted ingridients that will ultimately decide what your wedding will taste like.
Seek the ultimate dress of your dreams, book your favorite make-up artist, choose that venue that took your heart, create the decoration that you have been dreaming of. But remember. Remember. Remember. They do not make a beautiful wedding.
Your whole life does.